because reading books is too mainstream

Dear Blog,



It kinda blows when you try to be nice to someone, but instead they treat you like crap. Makes me realize that some people really, really suck in this world.

But why do I care? Why do I even feel this way? I mean, it's not like I wanted anything in return. Is having a nice, friendly friendship asking for too much?

Did I not receive the "Modern Day Friendship" rule book by mistake?

What I hate the most is that I care too much about what other people think. I have this curse where I am able to put myself in other people's shoes and am able to predict their thoughts or actions and even feel their emotions. So, most of the time I would like to prevent anyone from feeling any kind of pain or hurt.

Taking care of other people's feelings is messy business, coz I can feel what they're feeling and kinda know what they're thinking of...sometimes, not always...and to have that ability I am sometimes dumbfounded, not knowing what to do or how to react.

You can totally read people by their facial expressions and body language. Not to mention eye contact and voice projections. No, I did not learn this from that show 'Lie To Me', more like...born with this 'gift'.

When I'm in a group of people...you know, just hanging out... you shouldn't wonder why sometimes I keep quiet and listen. What you should be wondering about is what it is I'm thinking of and who it is that I'm reading.

Because silently...I am reading you. Just by looking and listening to you, I can pretty much guess what kinda person you are.

You can call me judgemental, coz superficially that's what this is...I'm 'judging' you. But, no...I don't criticize. Wow, is there even a difference? Whatever. I call it reading people.

So what does one do with this sorta 'super power'?

I stay away from people. As far away as possible. Coz it is mentally exhausting. And people most often mistaken you for a very judgemental person.

It's just as bad as having their thoughts project into your own thoughts, having to hear many voices at one time. It's just as bad as you having so many mixed up feelings all jumbled up inside of you, leaving you all confused.

.so, which X-Men am I? l e n a.

dodge this

Dear Blog,

I am such a picky person when it comes to finding that 'right' guy. So, I told myself "let's just leave it to Mommy. She'll help me out while I go about my business".

It's so much easier that way. And the best part about this arrangement is, I wouldn't really have to worry about getting the family's approval since he'd have to go through all that 'filtration' process before anything real happens.

Last weekend, Mommy bumped into our old neighbour (from our house in SS18, which was ages, ages ago!). And she was saying how hard it was for her son (who is now 31 years old) to settle down because nowadays most girls (in the city of course) just wanna have fun and not wanting to tie the knot yet.

So the nuts and bolts were cranking, and Mommy had this brilliant idea to set both her son and I up. She seems excited, and I really don't mind coz my social circle pretty much shrunk lately.

Mommy has yet to contact the lady, but wants to get to know the mom first and sorta dig-up on their family background before doing anything really...which is good. You do yo thang momsies! :)

Anyway, I still haven't received that induction letter yet. Mael, a friend from Manipal-Melaka college will be going to his next week. Too bad, thought it would be interesting if we got the same time. Oh well, hope he gets the hospital he wanted :) Good Luck dude!

I recently finished Max Payne 3, which is like one of my must-do things before I start work and I must say...I really, really loved the game. Even though Rockstar got rid of that film noir feel that I so loved (and the comic strip. God, why didn't they keep that??) I really enjoyed it.

No, it was not dark and snowy. It was hot, sunny and sweaty. I guess they wanted Max lovers to experience something different since it had been 9 years after the fall of Max Payne. They wanted to portray an older, haggard, messed-up ex-cop who lost EVERYTHING and resulted to drugs and alcohol. The graphics were nice and to be expected by Rockstar games if you've played LA Noire, RDR and GTA. Not quite MGS4 but it's a great improvement from the first Max Payne where everyone had boxes as heads and a very constipated lead character. It's too bad Mona Sax got killed in the second game, it would've been nice to have her around for Max to finally get that happy ending.

But, it wouldn't have been a film noir love story if she lived back then.

In this third game, you can actually see and feel Max as an old man, and kinda feel his pain too because he had, as he had mentioned in the game, "lost his loves"...plural, not singular. It sucks that he had to become a 'bodyguard' to some rich family in Sao Paolo, but the killings still remained. I didn't like him shaving his head bald (because I love his hair, which is now glistened by a few strands of gray), but again...Rockstar wanting something different. I also liked the idea of how he changes his clothes after a few chapters and how his clothings would be drenched in sweat towards the end of a few stages. I love the golden guns, made the guns look more sexy. The fluidity in Max's movements are better as compared to the previous ones but there were glitches here and there because Maxy's too old now he can't even JUMP! gahhh! It also sucked that we're unable to throw grenades and molotov cocktails in the storymode.

I've played the Multiplayer and it was great fun! It's awesome that you can shootdodge and go bullet-time while other players are also in real time. How the game and server syncs all the players at that exact moment is very, very cool.

The control setting is different though. Why is the shoot button R2 and not R1? That kinda needed a few rounds of gameplay to get used to. But, it's a small matter really. If you're a gamer, you'll be able to get used to all kinds of different control settings.

In a nutshell, I feel bad that this game didn't get it's much deserved audience because it was released after the much anticipated Diablo III. But, who knows, people might get around to playing it after awhile.

Two thumbs up! :) l e n a.