Dear Blog,
I'm definitely confused right now. MyV asked me out, as in asked asked me out. I really, really don't understand right now. It's usually just an informal date between the two of us, let's say for example :
l e n a : ...Yeah I like those types of movies too
MyV : Really? But the other one is better, don't you think?
l e n a : I definitely agree. Maybe we could catch a movie next time
MyV : I don't mind. What movie did you have in mind?
...and there goes the informal date. So it has always been me, the initiator for our dates. Embarassing? Not really for I never actually thought he'd accept the offer in the first place. Then there was the n.b. incident.
l e n a : ...Nope, I don't really eat rice often.
MyV : You sure? I know this great n.b. place near my office.
l e n a : Really? Hmm, I guess I'll try that one day.
MyV : Do you know where I work?
l e n a : No. haha
MyV : I'll buy you one bungkus the next time I go eat there.
l e n a : and how is it that you're gonna bring it to me?...
...and that's how we made the n.b. date that never really took place yet. So he told me he still owes me that.
Again, the initiator. Should I be embarassed? I don't think so, coz he totally told me, like, straight forward that we were only friends, despite the fact that I think he knows how I feel (Notice the 'feel' and not 'felt'? It's not past tense anymore) about him.
And suddenly, HE asked me out during a YM chatting session. A movie date. I mean, maybe when you read this you'd go like "Heh? That's all you're worked up about? It's just a movie date. Friends movie date all the time" BUT! for me, it's the first time ever that he was the one that asked. He told me that he's a really straightforward guy, and that he's totally not observant haha. (That's really the opposite of what I am) So why bother asking me out, when it can totally lead me on? And in a long run, it will always be me with the broken corazon. Sometimes I wished I never went out on a date with him. Better yet, maybe it was better if we never met at all. I know he never meant to lead me on, he's a really nice guy. But, my heart wants to believe what it wants to believe. My heart tells me that, maybe he'd suddenly have a change of heart, maybe one day he'll learn to feel the same way too. The way I feel about him, closes mi corazon. You melt my heart to stone.
Dear MyV :
You caught me by surprise when you showed your family photo when you didn't have to.
You caught me by surprise when you asked me out.
I wish I knew what goes on in your mind, when we chat.
I wish I knew what it is you're thinking, especially when we chat.
When you told me "now you know the real MyV", I told you that I didn't really know you. That's what confuses me sometimes. If I don't really know him, why do I like him so? Am I that shallow? To fall in-like with a really good looking guy without knowing the real HIM?
I need answers. I wish I had the guts to ask you. But I don't.
presto salad shooter
4 years ago
6 comments:
fuh farah...sounds like u r falling in LOVE...it does sounds like it...SOUNDS...hehee :P i didnt said that u do though..haha
well farah, some guys needed more signals...some can detect better..i guess, by the way u tell about him and you, it's like he's into you too :)
well, never too late to know him better...u have all the time in this world..minus ur classes and study of course...haha :P
lol...thank you for having the time to read my blog that i poured my heart and soul into. i really, really am confused.
I do like him, but love is too strong for my situation.
hehe, naw..he's not into me and i can c dat. but sometimes the signals he sends r so very confusing for me. i dunmo, maybe it's just me yg over-analytical and misinterpret kan?
no problemo farah. it's how i know u better. sometimes what u said in ym or in person doesnt reflect you totally. kan? i mean when we write, we tend to poured everything out. kdg2 nak ckp face to face cam segan and, somehow, speechless. :)
eheh...yelah farah..but then, as u said, the signals he's sending u mmg confusing.
where can u find a guy showing a barely knew girl his family photo? hmm...if i were in your shoes, i might get confused too..huhu..
no worries la farah. stay as friends as long as it takes. go and have friends movies dates. it's not wrong kan for friends to have date. u still have lotsa times for both of you. i mean to really think. just dont anylize everything. sometimes, things doesnt have to be anylize. they are left to be said.
let time decides what will happen.
goodluck anyway.
p/s: i use blog too to pour my heart and soul. any crushes i have, they all going to my blog. haha. at this very moment, i feel like i am starting to LIKE k. :) hey, they say, it's common to fall for your bestfriend. haha :P a guy of course!
*analize
no wonder it sounds weird when i re-read it..haha
lol..yeah, blogging is very therapy-like. thanx, i'll keep your advice in mind. =)
Good luck with your K..hehe
slowly..but surely..=)
call him! text him! know him n u will love him..
-raz-
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